Friday Night at
the Death Club Now #9
By: Kenny on Broadway
that boy with the sandwich in his hand
You wont miss me
Even though you can
He could make a dead dog laugh
And watch him kick my mother on her ass
Hes no boy, and yet he aint no man
He dont know what hes gonna do
In four years Im gonna be 22
All his friends think hes great
I'm your favorite teengenerate
You might say hes just too crazy for you
Im most outrageous, hope its not contagious
All the worlds got a one way ticket to heck, to hell
You cant think that hes no mickey mouse
Give me an hour and Ill destroy you your house
He looks just like you
Turn him inside out.
write words down. Ive gotten criticism (but only when I criticize)
of being some sort of rock journalist type. Im just a writer.
That might be worse, but I dont give shit one. Punk rock music
is just such a big part of my life I try to talk about it with
flair, style, and conviction. To let you all know who I am. I have conflicts
with people and shit cause they dont like me and think that Id
be a little easier. Im not fucking easy. Not only that, stuffing
rock and roll records into boxes is now the way that I support myself.
Its a fucking war for me. And you, whoever you are on one side
of the battle line or the other, Im sorry. Im not one of
these start a band and label phonies bent on getting a blowjob and this,
that and the other. I have a lady. She tolerates my quest like my parents
do- for me to be the biggest motherfucker, shredder youve ever
met. They want me to be that, cause thats what makes me,
me. And who am I? Im Kenny on Broadway, of course.
and Roll on the Turntable of Despair.
guess Im just going to have to rephrase myself. The last few columns,
Ive been trying to work with you people. Sorry, but I cant
work with you any longer. Most of you A.D.D. ass-licks are about to
tune out now but dont. Im tired of pretending that you people
will be inspired, and hope to turn you on, when I know so many other
people are inspired- but lets keep trying. You people are shit.
"You people dont know how it feels to dedicate your whole
life to this mic of steel
thats not keeping it real, a lot
of tight rappers out there that got no deal."
of my worst qualities is that Im put over by smart people- I give
punk rockers too much credit, and you blobs are morons. I started writing
this column to help you little faggot, morons wake up, got letters back
from smart kids, and insisted on believing that I wasnt preaching
to the converted- I was, and Im done with that. I know what I
have to do to you people. Thank you to the kid from Michigan with the
email named after a Delinquents record. This is the second time that
youve showed me that punk rock can be art but rarely is. Thank
you very much.
the Nazi Gothic Shit on My Face Thriller"
tube travel bus runs down the blvd.
Street rats sift through the garbage after dark
Daywish cities toss the trash out of the car
It blows against the building that will never touch the stars
Destruction- destruction devoid
Now its over
After hours streetlamps are the only light
Your daily movement, shifts from left to right
Streetscum mixing with the models, strike a pose
The manholes spit steam you cross the block it blows up your nose
Nightcream goes into open mouths and explodes
Gag on it in color, and in black and white, now its over
Nightcream lubes the night
Jean cream locked in a flaccid fight
Cars crash, they echo around the concrete hive
Death Sinners, they will die,
And the nazi goth shit on my face thriller left me alive
Cars crash, see a crying policeman thats right
Ripping tickets at the death club an a Friday night
Blood is soaking up the well on the drivers seat floor
you know what, this "Turntable of Despair" will be something
I invent for all the complete Midwest monkeys, internet perverts, and
all you motherfuckers who remember what it was like. What, what was
like Kenny on Broadway? Our lives you motherfuckers! The 1980s
you motherfuckers! A world without the term "garage," making
everything OK. Skateboards with big wheels and Black Flag stickers.
Fuck keyboards, fuck jungle rock, fuck garage, fuck squares, fuck fashion,
fuck country roads, fuck busses, fuck cabs, fuck city streets, fuck
anything but pornography, fuck massage parlors, fuck heroin, fuck meth-
long live beer, and long live doing things because you want to and not
because its something that you kind of wanted to do and can now
get away with it. Fuck rock stars, and fuck people posing as rock stars
while saying fuck rock stars. Live your own fucking life. And fuck the
back to 70s Kiss, classic rock punk scene and all this shit- I
dont own a Camaro, and dont know anyone that does. My friend
Brian owns a Mustang, but it really sucks! Stop treating the punk rock
scene like its full of people who like the Hellacopters- no one
I know does. TURBONEGRO, AEROBITCH, TOILET BOYS, HELLACOPTERS- I did
that in bold letters to tell you all that youd have cool tastes
if you were my dad who is over 50 now. Fuck youre little Im
white and I like motors, shitheads- therere plenty of bands that
you can get into for real without the shtick. But Ill tell you
a new thing, all you little defect bands from across the country- why
would you even want to be part of that shit? Kick ass on your own terms,
and stop worrying about whos moving to your town, or whats
going on at the gallery tonight.
That One Time Your Friend That You Love Was Over and Got Freaked Out
and Turned Over The Coffee Table- Thats Me- Im Torn Up.
Do You Fucks Care? This Is The Turntable of Despair.
a few records are going to make it into this. This new "Turntable
of Despair" section will kind of go along with the "Turntable
of Despair: Death Club From the Dangerzone" radio show Im
doing, which should be linked up from this site momentarily. I know
that Joe D. and Shawn A. have shows pretty much done. Joes just
working out some of the technical bugs, and well be in business.
Anyway, heres some shit for you apes. Some of it is, of course,
a bit old, but what the fuck? Timeless is what were going for
here- Ive never been partial to the flavors of the month. Youll
note that there are a couple flavors of the month in here, but they
passed my rigorous 21-point inspection.
Decibel Killers -
Lets focus on a couple of Japanese hardcore reissues that are
out there right now, starting with the band that does it best- Gauze.
The "Equalizing Distort" 12" is a collection of stuff
from the "Equalizing Distort" LP, "Thrash Till Death"
LP, and "Farewell to Arms" LP. This stuff is just so killer
and over the top. Its well worked out, but not in that metallic
lame way, and you will find no break downs here, whatsoever- just DIY
thrash at its finest that sounds like it might go off the rails at any
moment. I love Gauze. And then theres Lip Cream. This "Kill
the IBM" record is more hardcore than their earlier stuff, which
was more punk rock. A great example of this is on the "Punx"
compilation, along with GISM, and some other great Japanese stuff. Though
Lip Cream isnt as spastic as Gauze, its still great, maintaining
the earlier punk rock sound, but with extra fire, energy, and attitude.
Anyone who knows me knows that I just love Japanese rock and roll of
all sorts, and in the case of these bands, its just two more examples
of the little bit extra that Japanese bands always seem
to bring to the table.
"Blood and Tar" 10"
Ive been looking for this record, and I finally got one. This
is one of the better live bands Ive seen in recent years. And
though this cant really do their live show justice, it does a
decent job of invoking images of tortured, evil spirits playing amps
full blast, howling, screaming, suicidal, stomping, fuzzy, distorted,
reverb tunnel sacrificial rock and roll for the living dead; held together
by smashing drumming and attitudes on the edge of a straight razor.
Sorry guys, I know I still owe you $20, but we spent it on beer, many,
many full moons ago. Howwwwwwwllllll!
"Conformity is Deformity" LP
20 songs of filthy, filthy filth. Remember the kids the Pagans puked
on? They started bands too, assholes. This goes into a little more Pere
Ubu style Cleveland rock and roll, sometimes becoming a primal thud.
Cleveland, Madrid, Leningrad- we all die young, or at least die sometime!
Recorded live at the Poker Room in Oakland, California, with minimal
backing vocal overdubs. This CD captures this East Bay talk of the town
down to the barest bones, banging a femur on the punk fucking rock.
Screaming vocals, varying tempos, and a sense of how to write a fucking
punk rock song send this to the top of the modern day punk rock shit
heap- with a bullet with your name on it! Did I mention tough as nails?
13 totally ass kicking songs by a band that isn't actually going away.
"Save the Ants" 10"
This is an old record I just got a new copy of, featuring a couple of
Wyatt Circle Cambridge scene bands from long ago. The cover folds into
a rocket shit. Gerty Farish play really neat Casio and guitar music,
with lyrics of a hyper- intelligent minimalism. Now the pissed officers
play sugar fix thrash with neat sound effects, and when they played
live, they would have an easel with a giant pad of paper with their
song titles written, and flip it as they went with one song going into
the next. 15 songs would be played in 10 minutes. Just awesome. I wonder
if either of them are still around?
Sounds "Memphis is Dead" LP
After much urging, I finally picked this thing up. To be honest with
you, I wasnt sure how much Id really like it. Much of the
time, when people tell me to get something because they think its
something that Id like, much of the time theyre off the
mark. Not this time though, as I just love this fucking record. Without
being too garage or pop, they manage to incorporate these elements into
a really moody and brooding record. This thing is evil, hopeful, tortured,
and celebratory- it takes you on a ride that most modern bands just
cannot do these days. I love dynamics; I love haunting organs, pained
vocals, and fuzzed out leads. Fuck, Mudhoney is my favorite band, and
whether or not they nod to "Every Good Boy Deserves Fudge"
Mud or not, theres even elements of that in here. Sure, I think
this record could be a little bit harder at times, but whatever. This
band lives up to the hype that they have been given.
Hell Spawn "Scalpel Party" CD
This is a "Best Of" thing of this band, who have been one
of my faves for a long time. I can only compare this to the Butthole
Surfers with a drum machine, sent through a thick layer of fuzzy washout,
and a more twisted, macabre sense of insanity. When you listen to this,
you cant shut it off, but you cant wait for it to be over.
It makes you feel like you have scabies- your skin just crawls, and
finally, when youre about to have a complete anxiety attack (43
songs later), it ends, and you vow never to listen to it ever again.
But you will. "Rebel with a Bus Pass," "Sexy Girl with
a Sexy Gun," and "Stomach Pump Rock" are fucking classics.
Two songs from my favorite SF band. Great, skewed, Screamers influenced
keyboard and saxophone drive punk rock by four girls with no guitar.
Check out the dangerously awful recording I made of them on the Rock
Action web site.
"Volume 2" 10"
All you really need are the two Testors records, and youd really
be ok. What wild and blazing shit! As Ive said before, this stuff
was really ahead of its time. I dont know if anyone has
ever matched the degree of unbridled ness and frenzy inside a rock and
roll structure. Whoever dug up these six songs, Id like to personally
thank you, as Ive worn out my copy of volume one.
"Barefoot and Pregnant"
What we have here is a historic collection of 1981-82 punk rock centered
around the Minneapolis scene. Originally produced by Bob Mould, Terry
Katzman, and The Linehans, this was the 200-copy cassette that launched
Reflex Records. Bands included are: LOUD FAST RULES, IDOL THREAT, RIFLE
SPORT, IN DECISION, TULSA JACKS, LOU SANTACROCE, MAN SIZED ACTION, MECHT
MENSCH, RED MEAT, an interview with SHEIK, and unreleased tracks from
HUSKER DU, REPLACEMENTS, and SOUL ASYLUM.
"Pie and Ears Volume 1: Cleveland Then and Now"
Clevo drainage to the max. When the Easter Monkeys make an appearance,
you buy, and you die. Nail the Midwest boys to the cross- they want
it, and deserve nothing less. Other bands included: Pink Holes, California
Speedbag, Numbskulls, Dissidents, and more. Can you rock out to this?
Only if youre confident.
"Killed By Hardcore"
This is a great addition to the KBD cesspool, and entirely better than
any of the new KBD volumes. The Classic Left song "Fuck It"
is worth the price alone. Also, some great Terveet Kadet, Genetic Control,
the State, and tons more.
"Torreros After Ole: Five Old Spanish Punk Rock 12 Inches"
What it says- 5 12" by Espasmaticos, Toreros After Ole, La Broma
de Satan, Larsen, and Ultimo Resort. Fucking killer second generation
Spanish hardcore punk rock. This is another must have comp
thats far superior to any of the new Killed By Death garbage thats
been coming out of late.
thats it for Death Club #9. Check back to Blank Generation soon
for the radio shows. At my site: (www.angelfire.com/bc/rockactionrecords666).
Im going to have some more stuff from the zines up pretty soon,
and the live shows are working now. My Piranhas feature is also in its
final stages, and will be done really soon. Its official- the
Piranhas are back together, have played a show, and are recording for
a 7" and a new 12". Unfortunately, the old 12" is out
world is a shithole filled with scummy little shitbags who are scared
shitless. Dont you think hes a little anal? I think hes
Forget the Joker,
Kenny On Broadway